I've been sort of at a white knuckle, nail biting, not sleeping place lately which kicks off lots of crazy internal demons. Old stuff, way back machine stuff.
But I refuse to let the demons win, so I'm fighting the valiant fight to put da monstas back in da cage.
In the past, I've fought all of this alone. I'm sort of used to doing this myself. I've not had much in the way of supportive partners in my life, to be honest.
Until now. The Cute Boy™ is here. And he's a good man.
Yesterday he told me he had a surprise. I was too tired, weak and demoralized to fight very hard. "Okay," I said and went along for the ride.
The Cute Boy™ had a good surprise up his sleeve.
See, I've studied a lot of "woo woo" stuff in my life, from one extreme to the other with varying degrees of success. Several years ago I took a Learning Annex class on walking a labyrinth. It's a form of walking meditation that I really liked.
When I can get my monkey mind to meditate, it usually helps. A lot. I've been talking at starting meditation again for a long while but not doing anything about it.
So The Cute Boy™, either tired of me flapping my lips at meditation and not really doing it, or because he's worried about my freaked out ass, took me up to San Francisco yesterday to Grace Cathedral. They have not one but two labyrinths there, one inside and one outside.
Walking in I was unsure if I was in the right mental state to do this thing. Walking out two and a half hours later after three walks and much thoughts, I realized some good thinking had been done.
I slept better last night. My sister called this morning. She's worried about me. She said, quite surprised, "wow, you sound MUCH better".
Those crazy ancients might really have been on to something....
And it's confirmed...The Cute Boy™ is a keeper.
(this is the Native American "man in the maze", which is also a labrynth)
